Living a Life Imprisoned by Dementia

Here is my Examiner Article interview Patty Wilson as it was posted in November of 2009 prior to them closing their doors and removing the content from the Internet:

Living a life imprisoned by Dementia

A stylish, born sales person with an eye for art, Patty Wilson used to work for an upscale gallery as an art buyer. When asked her view of the world prior to the diagnosis she exclaimed, "I loved being around people and beautiful things!" Living a life imprisoned by Dementia for over seven years, Patty is adamant to continue to push forward; she doesn't want to be "Pitiful Patty." She doesn't want to give up although she is fully aware of the disability and in her words, "Life is going to take over me. They don't know what it is and it is happening to so many; it's a killer, a disabler!" She has had to make a switch to the basics in order to cope with her illness.

Her advice for others supporting someone with this type of disability, "Kiss them, tell them a joke to keep them laughing and keep them surrounded by loved ones and babies. If they like something, help them to do it as much as possible!" 

She used to love taking walks and although she can't walk by herself now, she is able to still enjoy strolls in the park on the arm of a loved one. Patty lit up when she described her latest shopping find, Easy Spirit athletic shoes. She beamed, "I used to fear I would slip and fall and hit my head, but now I can walk, little things like these shoes help me feel more in charge! She continued, When my family has things organized; what I'm going to eat and do next, it takes the scariness away from me."
 

Patty has loved music all of her life and the songs still live in her heart. Many times during the interview she sang lines of sweet melodies. Patty reiterated she would never have been able to get through her disability without having such a loving support system; she is extremely grateful for her family and friends, she sang, "We are family!"

When asked how she wanted to be remembered, Patty responded, "Oh, I do not think I can answer that." Although she was unable to verbalize a reply, the connection we shared for just a few short hours offered a silent knowing. Patty's disability might blur her past but this just heightens her present moment; the most mundane experience is priceless. Why would she waste any thought about being remembered, she is still very much alive. Patty is looking to the future and trusting her support system, knowing she still has a lot of joy to embrace even within the boundaries of Dementia!

Click here to learn more about Dementia


I was touched when my friend Jude suggested I meet Patty to learn and share some of her insights. She is such an extraordinary woman; I struggled with the Examiner's 200 - 400 word limit for this article. I could have written so much more. Patty was her Mother's main support during her struggle with Dementia. She had forgotten she served this role; her eyes welled up when Jude reminded her. Patty is a very sensitive, loving, intelligent person who lives to laugh. She told me her job now was to help make other people happy when they're feeling sad. Patty couldn't remember if she had gone to church in her previous adult life but she was sure she had lived her life genuinely helping others whenever possible. This is apparent when I learned of her family support. Her ex-husband, John (Jude's brother), welcomed her into his home and took care of her for 3 years (15 years after their divorce) and he continues to actively participates as a loving caregiver. She lives with her son, Jesse, and his wife, Molly in their home and her daughter, Olivia, is also a strong support for her. Jude, along with others in Patty's circle of love contributes much loving care by sharing precious time with her as built into Patty's weekly schedule. Jude kissed Patty’s forehead several times during the interview when her emotions surfaced as she shared her story. Patty told me there was a time when she thought she didn't have any people but she knew now that she was wrong. She communicated she had a lot of thanking to do. I replied by reminding her that the people, in her life today, are a testament of the love she shared and I'm sure they are thanked everyday when they see her smile and hear her laugh! I'm so grateful for the opportunity to meet Patty Wilson!