Conflict is Natural

 

Kathryn J. Raths, LLC photo 

 

I used to think of conflict as drama, but as I’ve grown older, I realize that society has influenced this perspective. If I ran from conflict, I would be exhausted. And it would feel like I am running from life; it is a natural part of life. Why? Because we are all individuals. I really believe conflict can be a good thing. When I think of my relationship with my fiancé, for example, while he and I have similar ideals and dreams, our strategies for getting there are very different. I love this about us. We are both good people with good intentions and both creative and intelligent, but almost anytime we are problem-solving, we’re looking at it from different angles. It is pretty cool. A relationship is made of two individuals, and it is when these individuals lose themselves within the relationship that identities get lost, and when this happens, relationships turn to the worst. When we can embrace our individual selves and allow the relationship to complement each of us, it thrives in a positive light.

Yes, I am not denying that conflict can be bad, when charged negatively; it is destructive. Differences can turn into bickering, which turns into arguments, and then into revenge, and on a big scale, this can turn into war. But it isn’t the word itself that creates such havoc; it is the energy given to it that either lights the world or darkens it. Words can empower or disempower; once they are stated, you might be able to say sorry, but the bad stuff is hard to forget. Be intentional with how you speak to yourself and others; if you are in conflict, be respectful; otherwise, you could regret it.

Talk to me about the conflict in your life. Can you see its light? Share with me.