Make silence your friend, continued...

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I was watching a SuperSoul Sunday with Oprah when the words, “Are you lonely when you’re alone” were asked. Oprah said she really appreciates alone time and that she does not actually consider herself to be social. I can truly relate to her response; I feel exactly the same way. I do love to connect with others but I really like alone time too. It is during the quiet moments in my life when I feel like I can work on myself. Our lives are works in progress and so, in the moments of calm, we must really embrace ourselves to better understand what we’ve been through, what is currently happening and what we can do to shape ourselves positively as we find our way to our soul work.  

I’m not really a lonely person but I don’t consider myself a loner either. I’ve always had good friends in my life and I’m open to new friendships; I especially like it when I feel a connection with a new person. I think as our circle in the physical expands, it reflects soul connections that overlap lifetimes before the physical. Perhaps it is angels that keep our circles together, I’m not sure but it is pretty awesome.

I’m also think we can lean on the strength of the angels around us during our quiet time; this space is very special, it’s celestial. It is important to realize this and to utilize and honor it as such.

What are your thoughts about alone time, do you value it?

Life Subtleties, continued...

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I am someone who works hard to get things done but as I age I am realizing that the downtime is more important than the uptime. When I slow down and feel my moment, I gain so much more my life. Whether I’m doing something tedious, suffering turmoil, or experiencing serenity, I am able to find the light that exists within.

Before I grew up I thought that during the times of sorrow I was being punished and God had stepped aside. But, I’ve learned that God is more present in these sad moments than in the brighter ones because this is when we need him most. Although, if we’re not fully present we are not looking for the light, we’re fumbling within our emotions stuck in guilt from a past wrong or fear of a future failure.

I am finding that the more I center my world with my heart and navigate with my intuition, my perception is keen and grounded in the present moment.

How do you stay grounded in the present? Or, does it really matter to you whether you are or not?

Behavior modification, continued...

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I have used positive reinforcement for years with my children. I used to motivate them with praise, with money or with other rewards like visiting family or playing games etc., It can be a controversial topic because, bribery, as some might frame it, seems like a pay for performance type of mindset. I agree but, in utilizing this, you have to find a balance. If you give your kids everything without making them earn anything then they become “entitled” and, if this is the case, you’ll have a hard time utilizing positive reinforcement with them.  I balanced this technique by offering up the reward system some times but also requesting help other times with a statement, “You’re helping me because you love me and I’m good to you!”

I still wanted their heart to be part of the picture but I did like rewarding their hard work. It has worked well for me although I can’t say I’ve tried it on adults yet. It seems like a good tool to add to the life arsenal.  I found it interesting to discover in a counseling textbook. What are your thoughts?

Autumnal equinox and balance, continued...

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If you’re like me, your body has already layered in preparation for the cold weather.  Okay, perhaps all of the junk food I ate led this layering process but as I state in the article, I can’t think of a better date to start my initiative for balance than the Fall Equinox. I am marking my calendar to start an improved self-care initiative in my life; more sleep supportive of a healthier routine.

I actually love the fall weather. I wish we could stop the calendar in the beautiful and crisp days of this season. I’m not a fan of the name but I sure do enjoy all that it entails. I like the thought of the harvest that comes with the season. According to Microsoft’s dictionary, it is defined as “season in which crops are gathered.” If we look at this philosophically, Fall offers a time to both reflect and gather our strengths. As I say in the article, “the abundance in our lives.” Take inventory of your crops for this appreciation will create more of the same.

Even on my worst day, I feel blessed. The drama may temporarily layer on top of the feelings of bliss but I am wealthy in love, health, creativity and passion.

Who could want more? These intrinsic blessings are priceless, a plentiful crop. Really, does anything else really matter?

What is your harvest this season? Leave me a note; I am sincerely interested.

We are not our circumstances, continued...

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Life tragedy is horrific. It is not something anyone plans. If we are somewhat healthy, we move through life trying to get ahead and making the most of our circumstances. Suddenly, from nowhere it seems like hardship scurries into our path. It is not welcomed nor is it deserved but for whatever reason, it locks its hold on us.

I have found that the only way to break free of hardship is by breathing oxygen into it and by changing my perspective of it. It is really hard to say, “Okay, I see you are here, but I am not going to let you stay! I realize my world is now different because of this loss but I will persevere.”

I then have to see the world for whatever it truly is, in my example about the loss of my father, I had to grieve a world without his physical presence because, until I was able to accept this, I was stuck within this loss.

It feels unfair and it really does suck, but once you can let go of your old worldview and start reconstructing a new one, you are harnessing your resilient spirit. Hardship does offer growth; it breaks you down but then it enables you a rebirth and the person who rises from the ashes is much stronger than the one you once were.

If you are suffering hardship today, I am praying for you; may you find your resilient spirit and persevere!