Beyond the physical, continued...

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Examiner article

This week is ending emotionally for me. Tonight I went to the funeral home to honor my friend and tomorrow I celebrate with my family and friends my son's 16th birthday party. I bounce in and out of the reality of life and death. It seems to be in my face where ever I turn and I must say, I feel worn out; physically and mentally exhausted.

Tomorrow once the party is over, I will find my way under my covers to fall into a deep and healing sleep. I will spend the next few days focusing on getting my energy back. Prayer and mediation will be key to my renewal. Soothing tea, light foods and exercise like yoga will aid in my recovery. I'll work to let go of my sorrow and accept the world as it is now, this week. All of this will create a foundation that moves me forward again!

The world continues to turn, the universe takes and gives as the cycle continues...

Her focus is so meaningful, continued...

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Examiner article

Janice Ervin specializes in grief, the spiritual connection and as a Hospice & Vigil Service volunteer, she has been touched by many beautiful souls as their earthly journeys came to an end.

She shared one of many stories, “One sweet patient taught me a heightened sensitivity for the plight of those who have lost their independence, with no hope of it returning throughout the remainder of their lifetime. Mable was in an elderly care facility, and had lost the use of her hands because of a stroke. She was never again able to dress herself, or leave her bed to visit the restroom without asking for aid, or take a shower when she wanted. Can you imagine waking in the morning and suddenly not being able to get up, use the rest room, dress or eat until someone arrived to assist you? What if you wake early? What if you are hungry or thirsty in the middle of the night? I asked HOC what her favorite food was, and they told me she loved coffee ice cream. So the first time I visited, I surprised her with a quart. When I sat to help her eat, she begged me to let her feed herself. She only had on a pajama top which ended high on her thighs. As she struggled to eat, the ice cream melted and ran down her bare legs. It was a messy ordeal, but she loved every second of it. More ice cream found its way on the chair and her body than in her mouth, but for the first time in ages, she felt as if she exerted control over her life. I pondered the situation on my way home that night. The next time I visited, I stopped at 7-11, purchased a cup with an extra long, large straw, and some milk. I carted my blender into her room, made her a coffee shake, sat it in her lap, and wrapped her sweet hands around the cup. She was absolutely delighted. She was able to hold the cup, and enjoy the shake while we chatted and watched tv for hours.”

Anyone who spends anytime genuinely volunteering understands the intangible and heart filling rewards that come from reaching out to others in need. Janice’s story is such a testimony to this!

Have you researched the organizations where you can volunteer in your community? It is a worthwhile endeavor to invest your precious time! Leave a comment describing to me what makes your spirit soar! I love inspirational stories.

A spiritual theorist, continued...

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Examiner article

It takes a special person to come to the side of a stranger who is transitioning from their physical being. Janice Ervin is a strong and compassionate angel here on earth! Because her message is so powerful, I will be spending the next few Sundays sharing her words with my readers. Unfortunately, my column is limited to only 400 words and this is far too small for all of the critical information Janice made available. Janice offered the following list about grief.
In her words,
1. “Grief is the normal process of reacting to a loss, on all levels of physical being. Bereavement is the period after a loss during which grief is experienced.
2. The emotions of grief ebb and flow. BE as you are. Allow yourself to experience the emotions of the moment – move with the ups and downs. Be angry or sad. Yell, pound a pillow, and cry when you feel the need – toxins are released through tears. And when the spirit moves you, don’t regret the healing joy found in laughter. Your loved one would wish no less for you.
3. Allow that grief is a sacred experience that doesn’t have an actual end time. It is organic to each individual, and a journey. It is not easily cured with medicine.
4. Grief evolves through the years – it is a process which unfolds the current loss into the future life.
5. Support plays an important role during the bereavement process, so share your process with others in a safe environment. Areas through which support can be found include family members, close friends and bereavement support groups.
6. In this fast paced world, the effects of grief on the physical body are often unrealized, overlooked and misunderstood.
a. Chemical changes taking place within the body affect levels of dehydration. Water makes up 83% of the blood and acts as a transport system delivering nutrients to the brain and eliminating toxins. During grief, chemical changes taking place within the body affect the levels of dehydration. It is therefore critically important to drink water, to replenish fluids and release toxins.
b. Replenish Magnesium and Calcium, as these levels are rapidly depleted during the grief process.
c. Eat a potato with its skin to increase your serotonin level. Omega 3 fatty acids in fish also raise serotonin.
d. Focus when possible on taking long slow breaths. To assist with this process, purchase a bottle of bubbles. Breath work forces the brain to cease it’s natural stress/alarm process, and translates as a chemical reaction that sends relaxation hormones through the body.
e. Progressive muscle relaxation forces the body to relax and increases blood flow.
f. Eat fresh fruits and vegetables to assist the adrenal function and because the stomach tends to be sensitive during grief
g. Assist the thyroid by insuring adequate intake of iodine.
h. Gentle exercise provides obvious benefits.”
If you follow my column and blog you know I suffered the loss of my Father through hospice. It was a trying process that really took a toll on me, both physically and mentally. Regardless if your loss was through hospice or not, the above list is essential to your wellbeing. Can you add anything? Drop a comment if this post resonated with you!

Do you believe in ghost, continued...

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Examiner article

Yes, I do believe in life after death. I believe we have an energy that exists within us called our soul and this energy leaves our body when we die. I also believe that some souls do remain on earth in a limbo form hopefully only short-term. I’m not sure why but many believe this is because they have unfinished work, they do not realize they have passed or they are truly lost souls.

The thought of spirits on earth in this realm saddens me. It is my hope that we do exist after death and that we’re able to decipher we’ve passed and move on to a beautiful place of being called Heaven!

What are your beliefs? Please take a moment to share if you feel up to it!

Find the sunset in your hardship, continued...

Find the sunset in your hardship

This blog post starts by sharing what happened the day in paradise that caused suffering and then reflection resulting in the creation of the article post:

I am grateful that I was able to get away with my family this week; we are in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. It is a peninsula where the sunset is in your face whether you like it or not! I can't imagine not wanting to see the sunrise or sunset or feel the warmth it gifts but I do realize there are moments in life that are so painful, they take our breath away, and even in paradise, this can block us from taking in this heavenly painting. I have started to realize there is a common thread in both beauty and ugly; they both can exist within the very same realm, light and dark, which is what I wrote about my article.

This week I am suffering from major allergy and sinus problems. Each morning the vehicle is covered with pollen as I'm sure my lungs look the same which explains the tightness and my aching head! I'm sure you are really finding sympathy for me:)

Yesterday, we took a couple mile walk on the beach where I met a couple sunning with their 3 dogs. We stood and got to know these wonderful furry friends; I took a liking to the largest fur-ball. He was whitish-tan and stood almost waist high. He was a gentle giant and he tugged at my heart. As we walked away and we were about 50 feet from them, a truck speeding down the beach hit my new friend and killed him. I could hear the woman screaming and sobbing. It took my breath away, ripped my heart out and stole my appreciation of the day, the week and my paradise at that time.

I wondered why I had to be the last person that looked into his happy, warm, eyes and pet his welcoming body just moments before his life would be over. But, I really think that, regardless if you are in paradise or not, death is truly part of life. He was a beautiful animal and I'm sure he was loved in his life. I was gifted with a few precious moments of his being and I will always remember this gentle giant! He touched my soul and I think I'll meet him again someday as his life has made a real impression on mine. Have you found any sunsets in your sorrow? Can you share them with me?

Finding the sunset in your hardship is another way of sharing the need to find your silver-lining.  When you brave looking directly at the face of tragedy and pushing yourself through what seems like your worst fear, you will discover, in the aftermath, an underlying gift.

It is hard to believe that sorrow, loss or upheaval can offer anything but heartache but it is true.  There is a common message that comes from survivors, those with clarity who have been able to find their sunset.  Most find themselves with new priorities and realize the importance of embracing their loved ones as a priority of first in their lives.  Theyíve learned not to sweat the little stuff and many reach out to others in an attempt to give back and share the lessons they have learned from their hardship.  More compassionate and grateful, they march forward with a renewed purpose.  

Are you wondering where the sunset fits into all of this?   This celestial gift painted in the heavens each day offers tranquil moments to those who are willing to take the time to observe it; although, this gift is a bit deceiving.  According to the Absolute Astronomy website, the intense red and orange colors seen across the sky during sunrise and sunset are mostly caused by scattered sunlight through dust particles, soot and other aerosols in the Earth's atmosphere.  It is amazing that such profound beauty is really derived from harmful pollutants in the air.  

Much like the trials and tribulations of life, it is important to realize the beauty gifted from its origin.  When is the last time you took a few minutes out of your schedule to watch the sunset?  Next time you appreciate this picturesque view, consider these trials and tribulations and look inward to find your own sunset; search for this celestial gift!

Courage Magazine Posted a Short Insert From My Childhood

My poem and photography (insert from my book)

My Story


My book in the recommended read listing

Beginning my journey through the storm or grief on Easter Sunday continued...

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Examiner article

I met Judy through a Facebook Bereavement Group, The Grief, Loss & Recovery group . This is a forum for support to anyone who has suffered loss. As I interfaced with Judy I quickly realized what a remarkable woman she is and how she was able to embrace life again through her faith in the Lord and the creative outlet she found through music.

I believe everyone will probably question their faith at some point in their life. Judy's story reinforced my belief in the power of having Jesus Christ in your life. She was able to lean on this relationship and actually strengthen it during such times of sorrow. Her story is extremely empowering to me! What is your relationship like with the Lord?

Healing through music, continued...

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Examiner article

It amazes me how many songs seemed to get me through times of sorrow in my life. Lots of tears erupted through my teen years from mushy tunes that seemed to cut into my heart after, at the time, I though was lost love. I used to think Brian Adams wrote, Summer of 69, for me since I was born in July the year 1969. Perhaps I had a big head but this song seemed to pump me up with crazy energy like no other! After my Dad passed, Footprints in the Sand by Leona Lewis, helped me grieve his loss.

While my Dad was in the VA hospice they actually had a harpist come into his room and play for him. I missed this event but I was elated when my sister described him perking up and becoming very present while the music played.

I’m horrible about remembering names of bands and singers although I can still recall the words to many songs that were critical to my livelihood. What songs helped you along the way, can you share any stories?